Al's Pals, Gals and Animals


A Lust for Notoriety

 Regardless of the bounds of taste and decency, and of how many beers it would cost him, Al demanded that these photos be published on this website.

The proprietors of these premises do not take any responsibility for the content of these pictures, and suggest that those of a nervous or psychologically unbalanced nature place a bag over their heads as they attempt to view this page.

Al shows his delight at finally managing to remove his thumb from a hindersome position with the aid of some lubricant. Al goes somewhere and is dwarfed into insignificance by a small plant and shunned by a stone lion. Again. "We're only here for the beer!". Al lures some 'friends' into his luxury pad with offers of copious amounts of booze.
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Janet about to seductively recline on Al's couch. Maybe. Clemens' (phonetic spelling) family at play. Al's two niece (by half).
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Janet in regal beaming mode. Al's probably doing his David Bailey impersonation at this moment. Although that doesn't explain who's taking the photograph. Mac the dog, menaced by a strange, swirling, psychedelic effect right screen. Oh no, it's just my scanner packing in. And for all you lovers of Greek donkeys out there…
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1975. Al's Uncle Tom helps him into a sack weighted with bricks. 1979. Rescued four years later by a Spanish sherry smuggler, young Al learns his trade as cabin boy. 1986. Al's luxuriant growth makes him a big hit with the hairdressers. David Essex sues for copyright infringement.
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Al poses with his gob-smacking sisters (he's on the floor, having had his gob smacked). Al in Tam's Bavarian Bongo Bar, modestly indicating his drinking trophies (the largest one, middle bottom shelf, is for 'Most Pints Drunk in One Night Without Actually Visiting the Bar'). Janet shows off her high-tech GDR bunker, from where she could produce fake NATO tank manuals, even during full-scale conflict, with instructions like "The coded command 'fire' should always be answered by the phrase 'I declare this tank under the control of the Democratic Libertarian Socialist Yankee People's Communist Resistance Army'.".



Last updated: 27 March 2002